The Problem with Broccoli

I generally like broccoli. Its quite the versatile vegetable. It can be eaten raw: dipped in hummus or in a salad or sliced thinly onto a sandwich. It can be eaten cooked: in pasta sauce or on a pizza or sauteed with garlic. (note, this is not an all inclusive list of broccoli’s many uses). 

The last time I ate broccoli, I somewhat overdosed on it. I believe I had cooked it with sweet potatoes that I seasoned with curry and cinnamon. Said dish was tasty and I had made enough to feed myself for a week. On day one, I ate a heaping serving. Day two and three rolled by and I was still eating broccoli, but with somewhat less enthusiasm. By day four, just the smell of broccoli made my nose turn. But as someone who hates wasting food, I had to shovel it down my throat for dinner. And for lunch the next day. I think that did me in. 

And so, for several months, I have been avoiding the broccoli while I shop for vegetables. I opt for rainbow chard or kale or spring mix or spinach in order to get my daily intake of green things. However, last weekend at the grocery store, organic broccoli was on sale and lookin’ mighty fine. I decided to take my chances and buy a bunch of it that would be cooked into some vegan mac n cheese

Fast forward a few days and I get to cooking the broccoli. I wash it, and start to chop it into tiny florets. Popping one into my mouth I pause for a moment to appreciate the slightly sweet flavor. ohbroccoli, wherehaveyoubeenallmylife! I peel the fibrous part of the stem and eat the crunchy part inside (what I have dubbed the broccoli heart). Its slightly bitter yet leaves my tongue tingling with joy. I steam it and set it aside. Clearly, I am excited to incorporate the dear broccoli into my dinner. 

Cook the mac and chreese, fold in the broccoli, and tuck in. Tasty. The broccoli reduced the creaminess of the sauce, but it was delicious nonetheless if not a little sweet. I loaded my plate with extra broccoli because I was rediscovering how much I had missed it. Perhaps I ate a little to much, or perhaps my stomach had forgotten how to digest broccoli, but within the hour I was not a happy camper to say the least. Burping up the flavor of any food is an automatic turn off. And its also not very comfortable to have it sitting in your stomach, like a rock, for hours on end as you attempt to drown it in super strong peppermint tea. Apparently I had not learned my lesson because lunch the next day consisted of a heaping plateful of broccoli mac n chreese. And once again, my stomach let me know that it was not happy. 

And so, I think I have developed an aversion to the treelike shaped vegetable that is broccoli. Just looking at it I get a lump in my throat and can feel it hibernating in my stomach. I can also vaguely smell the pungent odor it releases whilst steaming. And so, I have come to the conclusion that I will never purchase broccoli again–at least until the fluffy green tufts get the better of me and I am left spellbound by its power.

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