snakes and spiders oh my!

after my amazing bike ride to the marina last week, i was really excited to get back again. that is precisely what I did today after class…well, sort of. a few blocks away from the water, I saw a rather large banner which read:

I tried to ignore it, but I reached the end of the block and was still thinking about said sign, so i decided to turn around in order to satisfy my curiosity. parked my bike and hobbled into the parking lot where I was greeted with this
the sign under them says “we don’t swim in your toilet, so don’t put your hand in ours. score, i like this place already. I waltzed into the store where I was greeted by the smell of…many many reptiles. i knew this place was hardcore. I started looking around and was greeted by a salesperson who asked if i needed any help. I told him i was just poking around and he told me they were the oldest and largest reptile store in the nation, opened in 1970. wowee. the place is packed with just that: reptiles. all colors and sizes and sorts. a few amphibians. and lots of sarcastic signs on some of the cages. It was unfortunate that I only had 20 minutes to look around, but here a few highlights:

now aside from snakes, you ask how my week was? hmmm…it was filled with both good times and highly anxious times. good times would be going to the career center and editing my resume and having the career counselor remark on how much I have done (the bad corresponding part is i still feel like a fraud). another good thing was I answered 2 questions in my theory lecture, where I am head over heels for my professor (i exaggerate, only slightly). I also got 2 more responses from jobs I applied for, meaning I have 4 interviews coming up this month (the anxiety producing part is what if i don’t get a job!) another good thing, is that my homework/reading load was really light because I had 2 classes cancelled. but the bad part of this, was the extraordinarily high anxiety that cause because I always feel like I should be studying or doing something productive. I was nervously pacing in my room, thinking about things to do, some notsogoodforyou, asking myself what it is i really wanted to do versus what i felt i should be doing (even though there was nothing pressing to do! well, except for re-listening and typing up theory notes) oh my, time for a hobby and positive stress reducing coping skills! or writing letters. or reading for fun. or watching something on netflix or listening to music. err… I unfortunately did not having any baking materials at my house, because I usually do not have time for said baking, so that was out of the question. I was to exhausted to read, so that was out of the question too. here is what i did
a) made tea (mint medley)
b) put on music (cat stevens and leonard cohen)
c) lit candles (pumpkin and vanilla)
d) made pictures (which are on my wall now)
e) cried
f) discovered new music on amazon (free mp3’s…heck yes)
g) wrote letters to old professors (e mails, rather)
h) started portlandia…amazingness
and believe it or not, i felt better after.
interesting how that works.
now if only that pervasive sense of anxiety would dissipate a little bit more, i would be extremely grateful. I like to think it will once I find a summer job, but then I will just find something else to freak out about, like what I want to do with my life. and i know even once I obtain a job, i will be focusing on “the next thing” to make me satisfied. so the moral of the story is…i dunno, you tell me, why dontcha?

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